Art can change your Life
by drowningintonothing
Summary: I met him at a museum in Berlin, standing in front of an artpiece that I knew way too well. I recognized him the minute I entered the room and what was starting as a joke ended somehow in a very serious conversation and a much more serious relationship.
1. Art, Coffee and Kisses

**This is based on a dream I had.**  
**I met him at a museum in Berlin, standing in front of an artpiece that I knew way too well. I recognized him the minute I entered the room and what was starting as a joke ended somehow in a very serious conversation and a much more serious relationship.**

**This is the first chapter of maybe 3. The Painting mentioned is going to be made by myself as soon as I have a room and the materials.**

**Norman is very different from the real Norman. Or the Norman we all know. I don't know why my dream was giving me this version of him.**

_Berlin 2015_

When I entered the room I saw him standing in front of a big picture. I knew that picture better than anybody ever will. It was mine. For the first time in my life i sold a big installment to an art museum in Berlin. Today was the first day it was shown to the public and I had my camera with me to make pictures for my own collection. And when I saw him standing there I had to take a picture of it. I knew who he was ass soon as I saw him. The messy long hair, the brought shoulders and the way he was standing. I didn't need to see his face to recognize my favorite actor.  
It was a joke some days back when I read on the news that he was in Germany promoting one of his movies at the same time I was presenting my picture and being on a small holiday to visit friends and go to concerts. My friends were telling me:  
"Yer gonna meet him. Just you wait." And I was actually planning on sneaking up at him on the red carpet but I knew that would be the wrong thing to do. I was no fangirl that kept creeping her idol out or that was stalking him. No I pretty much appreciated him as a person and was incredibly in love with his talent. And there was one side to him I always wanted to get to know better - his artist side. Because once, before he got so famous he was a painter, just like me. So seeing him standing there made me smirk and I decided to just go after him and look at my own picture as if I had never seen it before. When he saw me standing next to him he looked at me. And I really had a hard time not to make any weird noises or to faint. Because his eyes were so much better in real life than on screen or in pictures. And his beard. I just had no words so I just nodded as greeting and then looked back at this big canvas in front of me. with the black and white cracks and the little color spots. A picture I was working on for years and it was surrounded by little ones with the same effect but different colors. Every single one with another meaning. A deeper meaning for everyone that was able to interpret pictures. It was then, when I was staring at that little blue one, that he said: "This is an incredible work, don't you think?" Smiling I answered: "It is. It is not only huge but you can see so many things in it. What do you see when you look at it?" There was my chance. My way of getting to know this man better then any other fan ever would because talking about a passion, about art and about the meaning of pictures was like crawling into someones soul. When he spoke again his voice had changed into a deeper and more thoughtful one. "For me it represents hope. The way those white cracks are bursting through all the black and the colors that seem to spread from the middle of the crack. Just like some hope in dark times." I smiled and looked at him. His eyes were still fixed on the canvas. "And the little ones all have a different meaning. The blue one with the golden cracks is like freeing yourself from sadness. The red one with the dark cracks on the other side looks like having a heartbreak or the realisation that some things are ending. The way this whole thing is arranged.. It seems the painter wanted to show the good and bad in life and that some wounds, in this portrayed by the cracks, are leading to better things even so they may damage you at first." It was me that was staring at that man now. Was it possible that he just understood everything I painted on this 11 canvas installment?" He looked at me and said: "Oh sorry, I was just..when I see art I can't stop myself." His eyes apologizing for talking so much. I shook my head. "No. No. This was actually astonishing. Pretty good interpretation of this thing." He smiled. "Now what do you see?"  
In my head I was chuckling at his wish to tell him what I see because as the painter I had a lot more to say. "Basically the same."  
"Nah, come on. You have to see more than this."  
"Why do you think that?"  
"Because I saw the way you looked at me when I was talking. You were agreeing but there was something like "If only he knew" in your eyes."  
Is it possible to fangirl over him without fangirling? Or to fall in love with him? "You really wanna do this? I just warn you." He nodded and his hand was pointing at the canvas. "Shoot." So I started talking about that canvas. I talked for 10 minutes or longer I lost track of time and it was him that was staring at me now. I could feel his eyes on my body. I could feel how he was turning his body so he would look at me instead of the picture. I saw him coming near me and when I finally looked at him without stopping to explain the installment to him, I saw how his mouth was slightly open and how his hand was playing with his beard. Things that would have made me nervous and incredibly freaking out in another situation. But this was my safe haven. This was my world. Art. It always was. There was no time for me to fangirl about this incredibly hot guy. When I finished he just said:  
"Holy fuck."  
I started laughing. "Sorry. I got carried away." "How did you see all this in such a short time?"  
"I am the painter." His face was priceless. I had seen his surprised face on several movies, YouTube videos or pictures but seeing it in real was just too damn cute. He looked like I just gave him the holy grail. Maybe I did.  
"What the fuck girl? You let me talk about this and would have made a fool of me if I would have said something wrong?" He was not angry but joking.  
"No because you know what the things with pictures and art in general is? That everyone sees something different. Everyone sees what he needs to see. And as I understand it you need a bit hope." Woah! Wait, did I just randomly talk to my favorite actor about what he needs? I was going way too far. He nodded. "I guess you are right." That made me look at him in surprise. His eyes somewhat sad? What the fuck had happened to him?  
"I think we all need hope. It is what keeps us goin'. So but, uhm, sorry. I never mentioned my name. I am Nicole." I had to change the topic before this was getting weird. "I am Norman." He reached out his hand and I grabbed and shook it. When I wanted to pull my hand back he grabbed it again looking at my tattoo. Fuck. He would make false conclusions. It was the same he had. "A star", he whispered.  
"Yeah, you know, uhm, I know who you are. I knew the second I walked into this room but this tattoo has nothing to do with you. I know you have the same tattoo but I wanted it even before I knew who you were." He nodded. "Does it have a meaning to you?" My eyes met his and I said "Yeah." "Mine too."  
We both looked at each other, my hand still in his and I felt a second hand holding my wrist. There was something to this I couldn't quiet name. Like a bonding over something so tiny as a little tattoo and something huge like my painting. We both looked at our hands now and for a split second I brushed my thumb over his star and pressed and he did the same. "Sometimes I wish that star wouldn't have the meaning it has." That is when I felt that deep melancholy feeling I was hiding so often move its way up to my eyes again. Because I myself wanted the meaning to be something different. So I just whispered. "I wish I would never had to get it in the first place but once it came to my mind I never let go of the thought of it. Because I needed it. A reminder."  
Norman nodded. "You wanna go through the museum together? Let us talk about art some more." Of Course I agreed. Who wouldn't?

After 2 hours we were done walking through the museum talking about pictures and what we see in them. I was looking at him the whole time when he spoke because I liked the way his eyes were shining and his lips were moving. I loved how he held my hand the whole time as if it was the most natural thing he ever did. And on the other hand he was observing me while I spoke. When we came to the last room he said: "I think this was the deepest conversation I ever had with someone." And I looked at him. Part of me knowing what he means and my other part feeling sorry for him. I had pretty great friends with whom I could speak of deeper things in life and some of them were artists too. "Maybe I should give you my number, so you can always talk about art with someone", I suggested. His eyes looked sad but he smiled. "Yeah. That would be cool."  
So I gave him my number. We were still holding hands. "Wanna go drink something with me?", he asked and I accepted.

We went to a little Caf we found next to the museum and were quiet for some bit. Until the silence was getting weird. "Tomorrow is your movie thing with that red carpet crap, right?" He laughed. "Red carpet crap? Girl you kill me. But yeah."  
"It is true. Why are they doing this red carpet shit. I mean come on, you guys are all normal people. Not some sort of angels or gods or whatever and I believe none other creatures need a colored carpet to feel special." Norman started laughing and was holding his hands in front of his face. Mission accomplished. I wanted to wipe away this sad look on his face. "You are jealous?"  
"Are you insane? Not ever. All this paparazzi and camera crap. No thank you. I would like to buy a cheeseburger without having 20 mobile phones or cameras stuck in my face."  
"What I would give for this." He took a sip from his coffee and his other hand was lying on the table. And without thinking of it I laid mine over it and said: "You could always quit and do something else." He tangled his fingers with mine, his eyes fixed on my face. "I could. I am thinking of it but I don't want to make all my fans sad."  
"If they are real fans they would never want you to be unhappy. They would want what is best for you. What would they have from you when you would be so burned out that you start getting sick? You are not 20 anymore." "Well thank you. I am not old either. But yeah...you are right."  
He smiled and I drank from my Coffee. Slightly wondering where this whole thing was going to end? Why in gods name was I drinking coffee with him and holding hands with him? What does he even want with me? Suddenly my self esteem started knocking on my head like "Hello fuckhead what are you doing? No way he would ever like you with your bad skin, your fat and your scars. Let go of him." And that's what I did. I let go of his hand and sat back on my chair. ringing as much space between us as possible. Norman eyed me for a while. His hand still in the same place. Neither of us spoke. I was screaming inside because my hand felt so lonely without his touch. I was single for so long that every little touch was able to set me on fire. To set my heart on fire. But him? How often did I see a movie, a picture or an interview and thought: "Wow. What a man. He is perfect." Now here he was, with me and I was afraid of the whole situation. I wasn't surrounded by four walls and paintings. There were people and what if someone would take a picture? Norman followed my gaze when I looked at some girls with their phones directed at him. "Gosh. I hate this. I fuckin' hate it that they can't let you have some privacy." Norman smiled. "Well, we should go somewhere private then. Do you live nearby?"  
I shook my head. "No. I am living 6 hours aways from here. I am staying at a hotel." "Me too. Mine is right at the Alexanderplatz. We can go there."  
I nodded. Somehow I didn't want to leave him alone. "I have to go to a concert this evening but we still have two hours left before I need to go."  
"What concert?"  
"Oh it's from a friend of another friend of mine. We met when I visited her and he has quiet a nice voice. She is coming too. So it will be really lovely I guess. You could join if you want."  
He was already standing up and grabbing his jacket and then hold his hand in front of me to help me up. I took it and we walked out to catch the next subway to his hotel. My brain was telling me again that I was stupid going with him but my heart was telling me that he needed this. That I needed this and that it was nice to have someone to talk to. And just maybe we could get something like a friendship out of it. Maybe I was hoping but hope was the only thing that kept me alive. Without the hope for miracles and good things I would have given up a very long time ago.

We entered his room and it was quiet shocking how big it was in comparison to mine. With fame comes a bit more luxury and when I saw his bed I started smiling and just said: "Sorry. I just need to", and started walking to his bed and throwing myself onto it. He was laughing and his hands resting on his hips. "You act like a kid."  
"Fuck you. It is been years that I slept into a queen-size bed. I slept on only a mattress for years and bought a normal bed just recently and this just feels like heaven!" If it was able to make his smile even bigger than I managed to do that. Suddenly he was kicking his boots off his feet, his jacket was off too and he was walking towards the bed and let himself fall next to me. "Are you always this comfortable with people?", I asked.  
"No. But I like you. You make me crazy."  
Pah! I laughed at this and just hold my breath to calm me down which wasn't able because that motherfucker was trying to tickle me. I started struggling against him and he suddenly throw himself on top of me, grinning and I punched his arm and shoulders to make him stop but he didn't. Tears were running down my face and I couldn't stop laughing. Suddenly he grabbed my arms and pinned them over my head. I was too shocked to do anything. My laughing suddenly stopping. My breath heavier then ever before. I looked at him. He looked at me. He wasn't grinning anymore and I saw how his eyes went to my lips and back up and I knew from all the movies, from all the writing and of course from my own experiences that this was going to end in a kiss. Suddenly I started struggling again. No! No I couldn't let that happen.  
He let go of my hands and I tried to push him away but I couldn't. Because the way his eyes went from blue to grey nearly broke my heart. There was something so broken in it. And again: WHAT THE FUCK HAD HAPPENED? He never looked like this on the screen. At least not that I knew of.  
"I'm sorry.", he suddenly spoke and wanted to get up but I held his shirt and rested my other hand under his chin. "Don't. I don't know you. You don't know me. But I can see that something is bothering you. So talk if you want."  
He shook his head. I don't know why I did it but I started stroking his cheek and he closed his eyes for a moment. "I am sorry", he whispered. "No need for that. You just caught me off guard. I wasn't expecting this."  
"But you are a fangirl. All of you are expecting me to be like this." Holy fuck, what?  
I took his face in both of my hands and he opened his eyes again. "Norman, you listen to me now. I am one of your fans, yes. Because you are talented and such a nice guy. You care for your fans and you always try to be there for them but at the end of the day you are still a human being with needs and with moods. You are still allowed to lash out, to get drunk, to say NO and for fucks sake when they want sex with you just because you are fucking hot they really have no idea. You are HUMAN and you can't just fuck everybody and if you don't want to speak to a girl or a guy or whatever creature is your fan, you don't. God, I don't know how often I told my friends that I would want you to have your peace and that I would support you whenever you decide to stop your acting career. Norman, when I saw you standing in front of my painting I didn't expect anything! Nothing! I would have totally understand if you would have said nothing at all. Okay? And for that matter I wouldn't expect you to kiss someone like me or for gods sake fuck me. No. Not at all."  
I could see all kind of different emotions running across his face. Shock, anger, sadness and at last something like surprise. "Why would you say that?"  
"say what?"  
"That I won't kiss someone like you?" He was obviously confused. I let his face go and pointed my head to the side to make him go away from me and lie next to me.  
what he did. I took off my shoes and then went back to the bed, my back against the headboard, my knees to my chest. I didn't like to say those things out loud.  
"Because I saw your girlfriends. They were models. And I am nothing like that. My body is completely damaged. Completely fucked up. I already lost a lot of weight but it is still not good enough for someone like you. And all those scars. No. I really wouldn't want you to see that because you need someone wonderful, cute and hot looking at your site. Not that I am reading much into this day here. Just sayin'."  
"The hell girl? What the fuck did happen to you that you speak about yourself like you are nothing? Don't you know how incredible you are? I had to hold back kissing you in that museum with all your art talk. And for fucks sake did you see your eyes? I fucking love that creepy blue of yours. Because sometimes they are grey. I saw it, when I touched that star. The color changed." I nodded. Yeah my eyes do that.  
"But.."  
"No. Shut up." He moved towards me and was sitting next to me. "I want to kiss you. Like fucking yesterday."  
I raised an eyebrow. "Don't you dare talk to me like you are Daryl Dixon you fucker. You can articulate yourself in your own language or do I have to talk irish to yeh?"  
He chuckled. "Sorry."  
He grabbed my hand and played with the ring on my thumb and touched the tattoo again. Then he took my hand to his mouth. Kissing it. I looked at him and I would lie if I say I wouldn't want to kiss him. Because I do. I really fucking wanted his lips on mine. His head was already coming closer and he looked at me once more and then closed his eyes, pressing his lips on mine. His hand grabbing my neck, pulling me closer to him. It was a gentle kiss and it ended very soon. He looked at me again, his hand still resting at my neck. And I looked at him. I stopped thinking and just crashed my lips against his. I felt him smiling and slightly parting his lips and so did I. Our tongues first tapped at each others, shyly tasting the other and then we started kissing more passionate. He was moving his body but never letting go of my mouth and he placed himself in front of me, resting between my legs. Somehow sitting, half lying. I had no idea what he was doing but I didn't care. I just kissed him. I felt his beard rubbing against my face, felt his hand on my neck, slightly grabbing my hair and I felt his other hand on my cheek. We parted to breathe and he was moving again, pulling me down so I would lay down. He lay down too, shoving one arm underneath my back and one over my head, playing with my hair. I tangled our legs together and grinned when he whispered: "Koala."  
"Sorry, I should have given you a warning. I am very clingy."  
"I don't mind that."  
"Good."  
He kissed my cheek and slowly made his way to my neck but stopped before he put a kiss underneath my ear. Then he whispered "Thank you."  
"What for?" His face came into my view again and he said: "That you wouldn't expect me to do anything."  
"You are welcome and by the way you are not a whore! Jesus, I think I really need to knock some sense in your fans. I should start a campaign or something." Norman giggled. "Are you my pitbull?"  
"Mister Reedus I think you are going way too far here. I am your guardian angel you idiot!" We both laughed and he kissed me again. This time the kiss was more intense. He was playing with my ear and his other hand was wandering over my side which made me go crazy. I had goosebumps all over my skin. My right hand was buried in his hair and my left hand stroking his back. Until I felt something grow inside his pants and I smiled while he kissed me. "What are you smiling at?", he asked. "Nothing." Norman looked at me and then started moving his hip against my middle. "Is this 'nothing'?" "I wouldn't say that. I haven't seen it yet." That face I saw in front of me after saying this was worth every wordplay. Norman shook his head and chuckled again. I was going nuts inside my head. All those thoughts were freaking me out. Where is this going? Is this like the fanfictions my group of friends wrote? Is this reality or am I dreaming? Do I really want this?  
"You are thinking too loud", Norman stated. His finger tipping on my forehead.  
"What is in there?"  
"A rollercoaster that can't decide what to do."  
"You are nervous."  
I nodded and slapped myself. What did I learn about him? He has a thing for nervous girls. He had said that when he had to play the sex scene in "Tough Luck." "I'm sorry. Didn't want you to feel uncomfortable but you know I am easily aroused."  
"Which is a good thing, Norman. It is okay. Don't apologize. It is a compliment in some kind of way."  
Normans eyebrows were raised and he lifted his body with his arms and watched me confused. "Compliment?"  
My legs let go of his and he was sitting back on his knees while I was sitting up too. "Yeah that you would get an erection with someone like me."  
A more confused look. "Nicole, really. Shut the fuck up. It is true, I never was with someone that was not skinny or a model but where did that lead me? I am 46 and single. I am 46 and there is no fucking model at my side. Is there? They all just...None of them was able to deal with me for long."  
My heart was suddenly aching and my mind was flooded with all the pictures I saw of him. He was right. He was still single.  
"What happened to your last girlfriend?"  
"She left me some month ago. She is with someone younger and with even more money than me." I nodded. "I am sorry."  
He let his breath slip out of his mouth and I moved towards him, grabbing his hand.  
"You know, I would love to be a part of your life. And I don't say that because I am a fangirl. I say it to the man that is sitting here, with me, and who let all his walls down for once. Who is not hiding behind sunglasses and an angry look on his face or silly dances and licking faces. I am talking to the guy that I met at the museum. The one that needed hope."  
Norman closed his eyes, his hand still in mine and I pressed the little star. "I am so tired. That is why I am staying longer in Germany than I have to. I need a break. And even so people know me all over the world it is different in other countries. I need time to think about stuff. About acting. About my dreams."  
I didn't like this. I didn't like the way his voice sounded and how broken he looked. That was so wrong! He was so beautiful. Seeing this nearly made me cry. But I was strong enough for this. I could pull this through. It is what I always did. Be strong for others and then be strong for yourself. It was ridiculous. It is only been hours that I met him and I already would fight for him and be there for him.  
That's what comes with the package. Once someone earned my trust and earned my attention they would never have to deal with stuff alone. My mind was rushing to several possibilities what to do next and the only thing my heart came up with was: HUG HIM! That is what I did. He was a hugger. He always said that. But I guess no one understood that he was doing it because HE NEEDED it. I hugged him, tight. I pressed him against my body. My mouth resting on his shoulder. I pulled away his shirt there and kissed the little cross on his collarbone. After seconds his arms were slung around my body and his fingers buried in my skin. This would leave bruises but i didn't care. His head buried in my neck. I could feel how his heart was beating in his chest and how he started to relax. As id he had to let go of all the things that had made him tense. We sat like this for a long time until I could feel his grip getting softer and his mouth was putting kisses to my neck. My only thought was: Thank God he didn't start crying. Because that would have been too much. Norman let go of me and slowly I was letting go of him, but as soon as I did I grabbed his face and kissed him. He immediately kissed back and opened his mouth. Our tongues dancing and I decided that I wanted to feel a bit more. My hands were resting on his hips and I slowly shoved them under his shirt, feeling the skin on his stomach, his sides and brushing against the spot his tattoo was on his chest. Norman stopped the kiss to pull his shirt off. I smiled because I loved his bare chest and already was touching him before he was back to putting his tongue where it was seconds ago. My hands wandered to his back, moving up and down his spine which made his breathing a bit heavier and again our lips parted. "If you don't stop, I can't stop."  
To shut him up I took off my shirt too. This was a big deal for me because I hated when people saw me naked. When say saw the stretchmarks from my weight problems. My eating disorder. This was my problem. I loved being touched and I loved sex but I always had this weird thoughts in my head. But right at that moment I just wanted him.  
Norman automatically grabbed my neck and pulled my to him and kissed me again. One hand was resting over my heart and slowly pulling down the cup of my bra, the other hand was opening it. When Norman touched my nipple I was completely convinced that I would die in the process of having sex with him. I was not going to survive this.  
When he strived my bra off my body he didn't miss any spot to touch. His hands never leaving my skin. He was rolling both nipples in his fingers now which made me grab his hair and moan out. For a moment he let go off my nipples and I watched him as he looked at me. My hands moving to his belt, to get rid of those unnecessary clothing. Why was he wearing clothes? When I started opening his pants he moved to the edge of the bed to stand up to make it easier. I moved with him, sitting on the edge of the bed and I smiled. Perfect height. I pulled down his pants and started laughing. Tie-dyed Tighty Whiteys. Those things would haunt me forever. "Fuck. I forgot I am wearing those", he whispered. "I am just glad you are not wearing a pink robe right now or a corset." He chuckled. I kissed his stomach and let my fingers hook into his underwear, before pulling it down too. Norman stepped out of both and stripped off his socks too. He was now completely naked and I was getting red. For fucks sake why did he look like this? There goes my sanity. His manhood was immense. And I couldn't help myself but touch it the minute I could move again.  
I stroked it and heard that he was moaning and making little sounds of pleasure.  
That set my whole body on fire. His hands were now buried in my long hair. I looked up to him and he looked down on me. His whole eyes filled with lust. I stopped touching him, stood up and made him step back a bit before I knelt down in front of him. "Fuck", he whispered. I took his dick in my mouth. All at once. I didn't care that I was halfway choking myself. one of my hands resting at his tights and the other one playing with his balls. I started moving my head which made him moan even louder. After a while I let go of him, licked away the precome and stood up. "Girl you drive me insane."  
Smiling I whispered: "Payback for driving me insane since I saw you as Daryl Dixon."  
"You are wearing too many clothes."He knelt in front of me and opened my jeans. He pulled it down together with my panties and my socks and then pushed me back so that I was sitting at the edge of the bed. He was spreading my legs, his eyes never leaving mine. Normans hand was now resting above my middle. He looked and I nodded.  
He was waiting for a yes. He touched my clit and I moaned and threw my head back for a minute when I felt that his finger was replaced by his tongue. I had to see this. And I was already halfway there, when I saw him doing this. To me. Norman stopped for a second and then pushed one finger into me. "Fuck", I whispered as he added a second finger and then started licking me again. It didn't take me long till I felt that incredible feeling rush through my body and making me say his name louder than ever before. When my orgasm was over he pulled his fingers out of me and licked them clean. His mouth then found mine again and I was trying to move us unto the bed again until we were both lying and he on top of me. "I want you", he whispered in my ear and my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. "And I need you", I whispered back. He kissed me one more time before reaching over to the nightstand and opening the little box that was standing on it. He took a condom out of it. I smiled. I started stroking him until he was ready to roll the condom over his penis.  
Norman looked at me and kissed me again. "I want to go slow", he said.  
"Okay. I thought you were more the rough sex guy."  
Norman grinned. "Yeah I am but today I need some flower sex."  
I chuckled. "This is okay with me. I already had my pleasure." He nodded and placed himself between my legs, one arm holding his weight, while the other one was playing with my nipple. I felt him push into me very slow as if he was afraid to break something. And it was then that I knew he wanted this to be slow because it wasn't me that he was afraid of breaking. He was afraid to break himself. It was one thing to have angry and rough sex with someone but slow most of the time means to feel every little detail. To feel more than the body feels. And I would let him have this. Even so I would love to see his animal side.  
I moved my legs up and crossed them behind his back. He was pushing deeper now and he moved slowly out and in again. His breath only slightly heavier than normal. He looked at me and stopped for a second. His blue eyes fixed on mine and for a second I thought I was drowning. What was he doing?  
When he didn't stop I would completely fall in love with him. He didn't stop. He stared at me and then moved again. I closed my eyes to break this connection and was glad when he started moving a bit faster and started kissing me again. When I opened my eyes the next time he was smiling, his lips slightly parted and his eyes dark and passionate. I could feel him getting harder and I knew I wouldn't have a second orgasm with this slow speed but this was okay. I was satisfied to see tis beautiful face in front of me. To feel him. When he came his face looked relieved and he bit down on my shoulder to not make any sound. I stroked his head and back and kissed the side of his head. Norman started kissing my neck and my cheek. He pulled out of me, throwing the condom to the ground and placed himself next to me.

He opened his arms and was telling me to move closer and I did. Cuddling after Sex. Okay. Any more surprises for the day?  
"Sorry", he said.  
"For what?"  
"That you didn't have a second orgasm." That made me laugh. "Uhm thank you but I had one. More than with other guys."  
He eyes me confused. "What?"  
"Not every guy would care for a girl like you did. You made sure to make me come first. Others just, ya' know, get there pleasure."  
"Idiots. I don't like those guys. A girl is your queen. You need to take care of her."  
"See. You are my king now." We both chuckled and he pulled me closer and kissed me.  
"But I never thought you are such a teddy bear."  
That face I got for this was priceless. He was torn between laughing and getting angry but then decided to just snort.  
"Nicole?"  
"Hm?"  
"Is it possible to fall in love with someone you just met?"  
Well...that made my stomach twist so much that I just stared at him and my mind searching for an answer that wouldn't sound too stupid.  
"I guess so?"  
"Girl, I think you are turning my world upside down." Normans eyes were serious and his voice thoughtful. "Man, you have no idea. I just thought that I don't want to leave your side ever again."  
"Then don't."  
That's when it happened. I let fall every piece of my wall and just let him see me.

My real me. That one he saw in the museum. "Good. Because I am fucking in love with you."  
"And I am falling in love with you. I just...this whole day.. that was just too incredible."  
I nodded and kissed him.


	2. Teasing and Leaving

"Where are you?", my friend Jenny yelled into her phone.  
"I am so so so sorry. I am on my way and I bring someone else. We will be there in 10 minutes", I apologized for running late.  
"Who?"  
"you will see. Just met him. He is incredible. But you will recognize him."  
"you are talkin' in puzzles again."  
I chuckled. "Gotta go. Metro is comin'."  
"See you in a bit. Hurry up."  
Norman and I jumped into the just arriving metro and drove the 3 stations to get to the club. "I'm sorry you are late."  
"You are not. Liar."  
"True." He snickered and pressed my hand. He was standing close by, even so there was plenty of room. I could smell him and I could feel him breathing against my skin. His eyes pierced into mine and his lips forming a half sided smirk, before he started biting his lip and sliding his tongue over his lower lip. I smiled. Oral fixation. Jesus he drove me insane with that when I saw him in movies or pictures but in real life it happens to be sexy and funny. Right now he looked like a psychopath, not a sexy fucker. "Norman, you look like a lunatic right now."  
"Maybe I am. Ya' scared?"  
"Scared? Of you? Nah. Can't happen."  
"Sure?"  
"Yeah. Nothing I haven't seen before."  
Before he could answer we arrived at the station and I dragged him around until we were on the right road. I walked very fast and he started complaining. I guess he was a bit exhausted but I didn't want Jenny to wait for so long and I was eager to see her because it was such a long time since I spend time with her. We had such a great past. So much fun. Music, concerts, roadtrips. Hours on the phone talking about writing, songs, all day life. Until her life changed and she got pregnant. Sometimes things change. This was one of the things I didn't like. I missed the time on the road with her. Following our favorite musician Tom. We arrived short before the concert started and we searched for Jenny. I found her at our favorite spot at the club. She turned around and smiled when she saw me. I went over to her, Norman following me. "Hiiiiiiiiii", I nearly screamed and hugged her tied. "Finally", she said.  
After a lot of hugging, she looked at Norman and whispered. "Holy fuck, is this who I think it is."  
I nod. "Yeah."  
"Norman, this is Jenny. Jenny, this is Norman."  
She looked slightly surprised and shook his hand. "Nice to meet you Jenny."  
"Uhm yeah. You too." He smiled, looked at me and asked: "She okay?"  
"yeah. It is the language you know. English. We are not used to speak english."  
"I understand."  
My friend then asked me stuff in german. "Where did you meet him?, "When did you meet?", "What happened?". The usual questions of a friend. Norman kissed my cheek and asked "Ladies want to drink somethin'?"  
"Yeah. Beer for me", I answered. Jenny looked at me confused. "Want to drink something?"  
She nodded. "Cola." Her eyes went to Norman who nodded. She was already fishing for her money, when Norman shook his head. "I pay. I am the man." Both of us rolled our eyes. "You go then and don't flirt with all the girls", I joked. "Never. I have you now. Don't need crazy girls." He turned around and left to get the drinks. My friend looked at me. "Jesus, he is hot as fuck and his voice. Why didn't you tell me more about him?"  
"Because you never listened when I talked about that hot guy from that zombie show. And you never wanted to hear about him because he was "old". well fuck, he is hot and smart and jesus he can kiss."  
"You kissed?" I nod.  
"Well. That is a new one. How long has it been that you were kissed?"  
"Too long but the waiting was honored."  
We chuckled. We talked a bit about our life, waiting for the concert to start. When I looked around the room I froze. "Jenny?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Look." I pointed my head in the other direction. "What is he doing here?", I asked.  
"I guess Henry invited him."  
It sometimes is weird going out in Berlin, meeting famous people. It is even more weird when you know one of them by name. Tom. He hadn't seen us yet. Norman came back after a while, his arms around my waist and kissing my temple.  
"So, how long do you know each other", he asked.  
"Couple of years", I replied.  
"How did you meet?"  
"We share some interests. We like the same musician."  
I could see Jennys gaze going to that man across the room.  
"Sounds good. Anyone famous?"  
Jenny and me shook our heads. "Nah, he is a local singer and songwriter. Nice guy and we have seen him about 30 times or more."  
"Aww groupies", Norman said amused and huffed my side.  
Jenny was standing at my left side, while Norman stood at my right side and she whispered into my ear. "Tom saw us." I sighed. Now this would be interesting. He had never seen us with guys, except for Henry, the musician we were now waiting for and that went totally wrong. Instead of happy glares from stage we got death glares. Jealousy jumping around like a wild fire. That's when we decided to never take a guy to a concert again. Yet, here I was, with Norman.  
Tom moved in front of us, smiling, his blue eyes wandering from one to another and his glasses reflecting the light. He was holding a bottle of beer and greeted us with "Hello Ladies."  
Jenny and I answered with a simple "Hi", while Norman said nothing at all. Instead whispered into my ear: "Who is he?"  
My heart was beating way too fast in that moment. Norman sounded jealous, in front of me was my favorite musician and I was still a bit in awe about the whole day. "So, uhm, Tom that is Norman." Both nodded. "Norman, that is Tom, our favorite musician."  
"Oh, the one you were talking about just minutes ago?"  
"Yeah. That would be him."  
Norman smiled and reached one hand to greet Tom properly.  
Tom asked in german: "Why do we speak english?"  
"Because Norman is obviously american and I doubt he would get every single german word."  
"Okay. How did you meet? Since when are you taken? I always saw you two alone."  
Norman chuckled and I looked at him. And before I could say anything he said: "Are you nosy or jealous?"  
Which made Jenny and me laugh and I gave Norman a clap on the back of his head.  
Tom looked surprised and answered: "Nosy?"  
"Good answer. She is my girl."  
"Holy crap guys. Are we in some kind of dirty dancing movie or what?", I tried to pull that conversation in another direction.  
Jenny stared at Tom and Norman and I just shook my head. Until I heard Norman say: "I met her this morning at the art museum. IN front of that amazing painting of hers and we talked a lot about art and life and then went to drink a coffee. The moment I met her was some sort of earthquake or lightning. There is just something about her and I fell in love with her the moment she touched my hand. I hope this answer was to your satisfaction."  
He then kissed my temple and I felt him smiling. "Uhm. Yeah. Wow. Pretty fast." Then he turned to speak with Jenny for a bit and I turned around and gave Norman a kiss. "you are such a devil", I mumbled.  
"Sorry. No not sorry", he replied and kissed me again.  
After some minutes the concert finally started and I was glad we hadn't had to talk anymore because that whole situation was nerve wrecking. I loved Tom, for what he had done to me and Jenny. Giving us energy and strength. A light in the dark. We never had feelings for him and we never found out why we had that special connection to him or why he was jealous but that never mattered. At least not for me. And now it won't ever matter again, because my Light and my Energy was standing next to me. Norman inspired me to many things before we met this morning and I was willing to find out what he could do in the future. But was there a future? We only just met and maybe this was some sort of holiday relationship for him. Maybe we would never see each other again, never speak, never write. He is a superstar and I am nobody. Does the age gap really not matter to him? I know that it doesn't for me. I never was a fan of age concepts. I believed in souls. But him? He always had younger girlfriends but they were all supermodels. Which would be the third reason to make me doubt this thing. Why would he stay with me? What if he finds another supermodel?  
I was barely listening to the songs and felt guilty because I promised Henry to come and now I am not able to listen. Jenny looked at me for a while and I knew she would say something very soon. So I looked at her and smiled. Norman was still holding my waist, his fingers drawing circles on my side and every other minute he was kissing my hair, my temple, my cheek.  
"Are you alright", Jenny asked in german.  
"I don't know."  
"Why?"  
"Is this real or am I dreaming?"  
She chuckled. "I think you are awake. So this is reality."  
"Okay."  
She shook her head and then looked to the stage again. I leaned my head against Normans shoulder and he kissed the top of my head. "How long does this concert go?", he asked.  
"Think another hour."  
"I want to be alone with you", he whispered.  
I looked at him and his blue eyes fixed mine and he was full of longing. He suddenly moved behind me, embraced me and kissed my neck. My skin automatically covered with goosebumps. One of his hands was stroking my stomach, the other one was holding my hand. He wouldn't stop kissing my neck and I was sure that I would be completely insane the minute the concert stops. My head turned to look at Jenny and Tom. Both staring at me and Norman and I raised my eyebrows. Jenny shook her head and smiled. "Maybe it is a dream", she whispered.  
Norman was pressing his middle against my body and I could feel his erection growing. Oh lord. I grabbed his hand and led it to my mouth. my teeth gently biting his palm, then kissing it. Then I pressed a kiss on that little star. His breath constantly getting faster against my neck, moving towards my ear. "I fuckin' want you now."  
I turned around "Sorry Babe, you are goin' to behave and wait. We don't want to make a scene, don't we?"  
"You are awful", he replied.  
"Nah. I just want you all by myself and don't want to share you with 200 people and I don't want to get any sort of disease by fuckin' you on the toilet."  
"Girl, your mouth is dirty. I need to clean that later."  
"Yeah but before that we should make it a bit more dirty."  
Then I turned around and smiled. I loved to tease guys and I loved to play the evil girl. His reaction was hilarious. He let go of me and just mumbled: "I need fresh air."And with that he left the room and I looked after him. Jenny immediately asked what was wrong. "Oh, uhm he had a problem."  
"In his pants?"  
"Yeah. And maybe with the pictures in his head."  
Tom looked at us. "What the hell did you tell him? That guy looked as if you had said something horrible."  
"Nah. I just said something dirty and unladylike like. Guess my darkside is having an appearance today."  
My friend started laughing and Tom just looked confused. Jenny just said: "Your darkside never leaves. Does he know about all the fucked up things in your head and especially the things about fucking?"  
Tom was only staring. Unable to speak. "No. He had a shirt insight this afternoon but I can't give away all my secrets right away."  
"Uhm. Did I miss something?", the musician asked.  
"No. No the less you know the better for you."  
Jenny just nodded and our eyes and ears concentrating on the band that was playing.  
Every once in a while Jenny and I looked at each other and smiled knowingly. Tom just looked curious and Norman was gone for a while. When he came back he was standing next to me, holding my hand and emptying his bottle. If he was out of his mind just by those words, what would happen if we would do it? Was I looking so innocent or why was he so surprised? I hope I would find out after the concert. He was avoiding my eyes but his thumb was caressing my tattoo.  
While Henry was on stage singing, I felt butterflies come to life in my belly. And I hoped they wouldn't turn into moths. Some people told me to enjoy the moment and that is what I was planning to do. My mind already wandered to the things I wanted to do to the man next to me and I smirked. I hope he didn't plan to sleep so soon.

When the concert was over we all ordered a last drink, Tom was still standing next to us and when Jenny was talking to Norman, Tom asked me stuff about Norman and what the painting was he mentioned. When I told him he promised to go and see it. When I watched him I didn't see the man I used to see. Now he was just a musician but he was no longer the one I was holding on to. After that drink we said goodbye to everyone and Norman and me nearly ran to the next metro station to get back to his hotel room. As soon as we closed the door behind us, I started undressing him. He was throwing his boots aside and his shirt was faster on the ground than i could watch. My sneakers landed next to his boots and I looked at him. He was standing next to the bed and when I came closer I started opening his belt and slid down his jeans and pants in one. He was already hard. But before starting what I wanted to do I kissed him and he tugged at my hair then let his hands slide down to the rim of my shirt and pulling it over my head. Then his hands wandered to the back opening my bra. I stopped kissing him and moved my lips to his neck, biting it gently and licking over the spot. He was now playing with my nipples, his mouth near my ear, gently kissing my earlobe. Norman whispered: "I want you." I smirked and bit down a bit harder this time. Leaving marks on his body. He moaned and I was getting on my knees very slowly, biting my way down until I was kneeling in front of him. I put kisses along his manhood, making sure to not touch the tip of it. My tongue was licking his balls and he moaned and grabbed my hair. When I looked up I smirked again. "Please", he begged.  
But instead of starting I made him lay down on the bed, grabbed for my shirt, grabbed his arms and when he looked confused I asked him: "You trust me?"  
He nodded and I tied him up. His eyes were dark of desire and he wanted to come. He wanted to fuck but I wouldn't let him have that. I told him my mouth should be dirty before he was allowed to clean it again. So I was planning on doing this. My first plan was to blindfold him but I didn't. I wanted to see his eyes and also his mouth would stay without a gag because I loved when he made sounds. I had heard him over years on the TV and now this was live and I really wanted to hear him. I hovered over his face and smirked, gave him a brief kiss and then started kissing his neck, his nipples, the spot over his navel and my fingers were sliding over his sides, thighs and when I sucked on his balls he throw his head back. Norman looked at me and started begging again but the more he begged the more I teased, until he gave up and I kissed the tip of his cock. When my tongue touched his tip and I started licking over it he moaned and was moving his hip up, to give me a sign to take him in. I pushed him down. "My play. My rules. Behave or I won't even do anything."  
"Please. This is torture. Let me just fuck you."  
"Later. I hope you weren't planning to sleep any time soon."  
He moaned when I took him in my mouth and then let go of it. "No. No. I don't want to sleep. Just do what you want."  
"My plan exactly."  
But then I thought I should start before he was getting a heart attack and when I started sliding my tongue along his whole cock, I heard him breathe in sharp and when I started to take him in again and moving my head, sucking his cock and massaging his balls his moans were getting louder and louder and he mumbled words like "fuck" and "don't stop" but I wasn't planning on doing so. It didn't take him long to unload his whole cum into my mouth. Instead of swallowing it all I was holding some in my mouth, went back up and kissed him, letting him taste his own cum. While we were kissing I opened the knot that was holding his hands in place and as soon as it was gone he grabbed my face and kissed me even harder. I pulled back and cleaned up his face with my tongue. "Hell, what was that?", he asked.  
"You said you wanted to clean my mouth. I told you it had to get dirtier before." I smirked and he crashed his mouth against mine. His hands sliding up and down my back until he grabbed me and turned us around. He was opening my pants and pulled them off of me. "You will pay for this."  
"I hope so."  
"Do I need to tie you up or will you behave?"  
"I always behave. I am really nice." I smiled and he kissed me again. Then he started nibbling at my ear, neck, nipples and kissed every spot he could find. I loved the feeling of his beard brushing over my skin and I looked at him. It was one thing to see him do that on screen. Another one when you are involved. When I found it hot to see him making out on screen, I found it awkward to be on the recieving end. But there was one thing even more ridiculous about that. It felt better than anything before. When he reached my middle he let his tongue tip my clit and I tried not to make any sound but failed and I could feel him smirking, when he started to suck it. He let go after a second and then moved back up to face me. Okay, I thought, he is playing the I tease you and then wait until the feeling is gone again and then tease again-game. Which I was totally okay with. Payback is a bitch.  
I grabbed his face and kissed him again. He seemed to lose himself in that kiss. His tongue constantly battling with mine and his breath getting a bit shorter. His elbows were left and right from my face now and his hands were playing with my hair. When he stopped the kiss he put some little ones on my cheeks and under my eyes. He opened his eyes and smiled. "Can we do this forever?", Norman whispered.  
"Nothing against it."  
Then he moved down again and started teasing me again. This time he was not stopping and when he shoved two fingers into me I moaned. He was sucking and licking my clit and moving his fingers inside of me. It really didn't take long until I came and yelled "Fuck, Norman." He chuckled and blow air against my clit and then kissed it. His fingers still inside of me. When he pulled them out he licked them both and then placed himself next to me. "Sorry, I need another second. I'm not so young anymore and my dick doesn't function like when I was 20 and was hard in 2 seconds."  
"Will you stop that? No apologizing while in bed. That's rule number 2."  
"What is one?"  
"Don't do anything you don't want to do."  
"Yeah. I can live with that."  
"Yep." I looked at him, his arms crossed behind his head, which was facing me and I couldn't stop smiling. He was so gorgeous. "You are beautiful, you know that?"  
Norman smirked. "Yeah. People tell me that like 300 times a day."  
I rolled my eyes and slapped his chest. "Idiot."  
My hand was now touching the tattoo on his chest and the little demon on the inside of his arm. I loved his tattoos. I started kissing his collarbone and he wrapped his arm around me and shifted himself on his side. Facing me now and our knees tangled together. My head lying on his arm and my right arm under his shoulder so i could play with his hair and his neck. The other hand was lying in the middle between our bodies and Norman placed his above mine, intertwining our fingers. We both looked a moment at our hands and I smiled. My butterflies were turning into tornadoes. When my eyes met his, I swallowed. His eyes were so amazing. My head moved closer to him and I touched his lips with my lips and gave him a soft kiss. "You make me crazy girl."  
"Same here."  
"We should have met earlier."  
"Yeah. Like 20 years ago..." Then I laughed.  
"Why do you laugh?"  
"Because I would have been 10 and you 25."  
Norman laughed. "Oh Lord I could have been your teacher or babysitter."  
That made me laugh even more and I shook my head. "Can you not...This gives me ideas."  
"Like Teacher-Kink Ideas?"  
He smirked and squeezed my hand and I raised an eyebrow. "For example. Even so I would always prefer you in an overall or covered in dirt than in tie and shirt."  
"So? You like Daryl and Scud then?"  
"Yeah and Travis, Lax, Mac, Marco, Murphy and all the others. My favorite is Daryl because he is grumpy and badass but has a heart of gold. Not to mention his dirty body and his clothes. And his crossbow and bike. Only the hair..." I looked at Norman and tugged his hair.  
"Yeah I want it back to Murphy hair", he said. "Which should happen soon. For BDS 3."  
"I will tell you something. It's a secret: My hair will be cut when I am back in NY. And I think about throwing a party." He smirked and I kissed him. "Can't wait to run my fingers through that short hair and tug on it. Is it going to be raven-black again?"  
He nodded and I smiled. "I fuckin' love your hair in every color and every length, except this but someday I would like to see your natural color again."  
"Yeah me too."  
"You know what I would like to see too?"  
He shook his head and I couldn't help but chuckle. "I want you to be so lost in lust that you are all sweaty and your hair sticking to your skin. I want you to bite your lip because you are so hard that it is nearly unbearable to not cum right on the spot. I want to see you in every position. And I want to see you wake up next to me, because I know you are looking beautiful no matter what."  
"And I want to hear you scream my name", he whispered into my ear and bit my earlobe, playing with my piercing. His hip was pushing against my leg and I felt his erection. "How do you want me?", I asked him and he smirked. "In every fucking position but right now I want it rough and want you from behind."  
So I moved myself in the middle of the bed, kneeling and waiting for him. He placed himself behind me and pushed into me and started moving immediately, his hands grabbing my hips. He was pulling me closer and harder against himself and he was breathing hard while I was trying to hold on long enough. He was hitting my g-spot all the time but after a while i started moaning because i couldn't hold back and he said: "Oh god. If you come now I can't go on any longer." So I held back my orgasm a bit and he stopped moving for a while and slid out of me. "Turn around", he commanded and he placed himself between my legs, entering me again with one thrust. One hand at my throat and the other one holding his weight. He pressed my throat a bit, making it harder to breathe. His thrusts were hard and rough and I grabbed his hair and pulled it, while my other hand was scratching over his back. His eyes were closed and he bit his lip and when I felt him getting thicker inside of me he finally looked at me. "Come for me now", so I stopped holding back my orgasm and came. I screamed his name as he wished and he came short after me with a loud moan. He didn't pull out instead he lowered his body and rested his head on my chest. listening to my fast heartbeat. "Babe, I want you to sleep here tonight."  
"I wasn't planning on leaving. I am well aware we only have this week."  
"Yeah think we can't make this a thing?"  
"No. I think once you are back in NY you will forget about me."  
Norman pulled out of me, looked at me and said: "I won't ever forget you. I want you. But I don't know if this is going to work. I'm not good with women."  
"Shut up. Can we start ruining this when you fly back?"  
"Yeah." He sadly smiled and stood up to go to the bathroom. It was like a dream coming true. And everyone knows that dreams get destroyed by reality. As much as I wanted this to work and as much as I loved that man, I knew all too well that there would never be a place at his side for me. Before he came back I put my shirt and underwear back on and looked at my hands. I rubbed my little star-tattoo and thought about this whole day. I would rather have a brief moment of this than none at all. At least this would keep me alive for a while. Until I find someone that wouldn't leave and that would be able to fight for me.  
When Norman came back from the bathroom he sat beside me and took my hand in his. "Maybe we can make this last. Maybe I should stop running."  
"Yeah. Maybe."

6 month later

I was browsing through the web, searching for a distraction. Work was awful and I had some annoying clients I needed something to keep me from getting angry at the world. My stories I wrote were all too sad and dramatic for the day and it was already too dark to paint. I wasn't a fan of artificial light while working so I sat down with my tablet and browsed tumblr. Liked pictures, blogged a bit and smiled when my friends made jokes about meeting Norman. I hadn't told anyone and luckily no one had taken pictures of him and me. It nearly was as it never happened.  
Every time I saw pictures of him I felt the moth inside my stomach. Eating me alive. After one week of amazing sex, fun and falling in love with each other it felt like a sin to part. And it felt like a goodbye and it was.  
We didn't write, didn't talk or see each other again. He was busy filming and I threw myself into painting, writing and going to work. Acting around my friends as everything was fine. When in real nothing was fine. But I kept on writing on tumblr and denied that this week ever happened. I read articles and watched interviews, just in case. When there were rumors about him having a new affair I cried myself to sleep after drinking a bottle of wine.  
He denied it. He said he was single and that he was not up to something new yet. There were rumors that he sold his house in Georgia and that his TV show wasn't going into season 7. He was in the middle of filming the boondock saints movie. I was writing with one of my friends and she told me that there was a new interview this day and it was streamed live. I sighed and said I would stay awake and watch it over with her so we could talk about it afterwards. It hurt to see him but it would hurt more to lose all the friends I made on the web while fangirling over Norman.  
When we watched the interview I put on my headphones to hear his voice as loud as possible in my ears. He was wearing black clothes, boots and his hair was short and raven-black again. I instantly smiled. If he had the party when his hair got cut? Who did he celebrate with?  
For the first minutes they were asking questions about the show and the movie and I just listened to his voice. Professional as always.  
And then the topic changed and I felt tears coming because him talking about his private life was as if someone was cutting my guts in little pieces.  
But I kept listening and watching.

Interviewer: "There are rumors you sold your house in Georgia. Are they true?  
Norman: "Yes they are. I had the house to have a place while we were filming. But with the ending of the next season the show ends and I have no need for it anymore."  
Interviewer: "What is up next for you? You are filming BDS right now. Anything else?"  
Norman shook his head and started playing with his beard. "No. There are no other films coming. I can't believe I say this but after Boondock Saints I will end my acting career."

I swallowed hard and was nearly as surprised as everyone on screen and my friend Natalie wrote me something but the letters were all blurry because I was crying. If he would end his career I would never see him again.

Interviewer: "Wow. That is a bomb you just throw in here. Why do you want to end it?"  
He smiled and nodded and was rubbing his tattoo. "I always wanted to be a painter, living near the sea or a forest and be myself. Without cameras stuck to my face. And I am 46 now and really want to enjoy the rest of my life. I don't say I will never do anything in the business again but I don't want it to be so...you know..time consuming."  
Interviewer: "Did you find a place already?"  
Norman: "I did. I will move away from the US. I will keep my apartment in NY but I will move to Germany."

(The whole audience was surprised again) My heart stopped. He was doing what?  
Natalie wrote me: "Wow he is moving to your country. Maybe you will meet him." I replied: "Yeah hell. Germany is big."

Interviewer: "Germany? How come?"  
Norman leaned back in his seat and I could see him breathe in and out, pressing his hands and getting twitchy. He was beyond nervous.  
"Six month ago I went there to get away from all the craziness. I needed a break and went to Berlin to visit some museums and to attend the premiere of a movie. I met someone there. A girl. And she stole my heart from the very first minute I met her. It was magical."  
Interviewer: "So all the rumors about you meeting that model were made up?"  
Norman: "Yes. My heart belongs to that one girl in Germany and I really hope she still wants it. I lost contact with her because I lost her number and mail address. And I tried to reach her but couldn't. And she didn't try to contact me. So I still hope she likes me."  
Interviewer: "Wouldn't it be better to make sure she does before giving up everything and move to another country?"  
Norman: "Well, what can I say? I am crazy."  
(The audience chuckled and I was completely shocked. Even my friends were silent)  
Interviewer: "Maybe she is watching and will try to contact you now."  
Norman: "I hope so."  
Interviewer: "We could blend in a number and she can call."  
Norman was getting even more nervous but smiled and I swallowed hard. What do I do?  
Norman: "Yeah. Her Name is Nicole."  
Interviewer: "How do we know it is her?"  
Norman: "I can write down a question and an answer. Something only she knows."  
Interviewer: "Okay. So Nicole, if you see this please call."

I wrote down the number and then typed my friend: "Can't answer. Have to call someone."  
Natalie: "You callin' Norman?"  
Me: "You will see."

I called because fuck I needed to. This was so crazy but it was my only chance. I tried to calm my voice when I heard a voice on the other end asking who I am. After I told him he said: "I will ask two questions. If you answer correct we will lead your call to the studio."  
"Okay", I whispered.  
"So first question: "Where did you meet?" I answered.  
"Good. Second question: "What were the last words he said to you?"  
I swallowed. "Whenever you look upon your tattoo or into the stars, know that I am looking at it too. Know that I love you and that nothing that is bonded by heart can be separated by an ocean."  
"That is correct. Good you called, now we will lead that call through. Make sure you cancel your speakers."  
"Yeah. Okay."

I cancelled my speakers and was then listening over my phone what was happening. My eyes fixed on my tablet screen. Then I heard the Interviewer ask: "Nicole, can you hear us?"  
"Yeah I can hear you."  
Norman was smiling, his hands hiding his mouth. Which was making me smile too.  
"So you were the first one in line and you answered both questions right. Norman will ask you something just to make sure."  
Norman shook his head. "I don't need to. I heard her voice. Hi Honey."  
"Hi Norm'."  
The Interviewer smiled. "So, Nicole were you surprised by what he said?"  
"Yeah. A bit. It's been six month and I thought he moved on. That he forgot me, just as I predicted on our first day."  
"And I told you that we can make this last."  
"No. You said "maybe". And between "maybe" and "will" is a difference as big as an ocean."  
He nodded and smiled. "You still want him?", the Interviewer asked and I laughed.  
"Are you serious? Of Course! He has to make up for all the tears and lies I told over the last 6 month. It was hard keeping that week a secret."  
"I'm sorry", Norman whispered.  
"So, you leave your contact and we will give it to Norman, so you two can talk about everything in private. But I have one last question for you. What do you think about him giving up his acting career for you?"  
"He doesn't do it for me. He does it for himself. As long as I know him he always said that he wanted to live in peace and in his own little world. With art, photography and his cat. Everyone has dreams and some of us are never able to fulfill them but if it is so easy for him now to stop acting, he should. Norman is smart and knows exactly what he wants. I will support him with whatever decision he makes. As long as he is happy, I am too. But I would never want him to do those things for me. And he would never do it."  
Norman clapped his hands and said: "I love you."  
This made me smile and I said: "I love you too. Talk to you later." He nodded and I heard the guys voice again and gave him all information he needed. And he said goodbye.

I watched the rest of the interview and smiled because Norman was smiling too. He looked happy. And when I looked at my chat I was laughing because of course Natalie had it all figured out and was yelling about my secret and that she was happy and jealous. And when I looked at my tumblr it was exploding with the news and people trying to figure out who that mysterious girl is. And I smiled because for once I was someones rumor. I knew stuff no one else did and for once I was the special someone. I was Norman's special someone.

He called me 10 minutes later and I was smiling like a kid on Christmas.  
"Hi Baby", he said.  
"Hi Idiot."  
"I am so so so so so sorry. Girl I tried everything to contact you. And when you never answered my mails I stopped."  
"Mails?"  
"yeah I wrote to your official address. The one from your artist website."  
"What? Can't be! My manager checks that every day."  
"well maybe she thought I am a fan?"  
"I will check that later because if she deleted those messages I will kill her for all the pain she put me through. God I really thought you were a stupid player and liar. I thought you just had your fun for a week and then left."  
"And I thought the same."  
"You really move here?"  
"Yes. We just need to find a house for us."  
"Well...I kind of bought one a month ago. I am moving in there in two weeks."  
"Oh. So..is there going to be room for me?"  
"Hmm..maybe..I can try to make some space for you."  
"As long as I can sleep in your bed I am willing to take everything. So you tell me about that house?"  
"It is near a forest."  
"Does it have an office?"  
"Better. It has an atelier."  
There was silence and I heard him opening a door. "I will drive home now. I will call you again. And Baby?"  
"Yeah?"  
"I can't wait to be with you and kiss you and spend the rest of my life with you. But I can't be there in two weeks because I am still filming."  
"Don't worry Norm' I will manage that stuff alone and I am looking forward to run my fingers through that short hair. And see you as Murphy. You know I love the Saints."  
"And I love you. So much."  
"I love you too."

Two month later Norman moved to Germany. Into my house. We had talked every night and we had skyped and shared pictures. But now I was standing at the airport and was excited to see him again. When the door opened and he came out, wearing a black shirt, jeans, his raybans and was smiling, I started moving forwards, closing the space between us as fast as possible and he throw his arms around my waist and kissed me without hesitation. "Finally", I whispered and grabbed his short hair.  
"Wait until we are home. I will let you grab every hair on my body."  
I smiled and dragged him to the car because I wanted to grab other things than his hair.

And that's the story how one piece of art changed my life. How one man changed my life.  
A dream that became reality.


End file.
